Past life

I miss you Dreamlight.

And I loved ice cream. But it's so lethal

SSSSSOOOOOOOOOO GGGGOOOOOODDDDD.

But like I said, past life.

Recurring People

If only math was as natural to me as seeing similarities in people. It's scary, seeing one person but only seeing the person you associate them with in him or her. It's freaky. And confusing.

Like I can't look at this one guy in my grade without associating him with a bald eagle. Scary right?

Yeah. Totally. 

But for someone like me who has been exposed to many social situations, one thing that's fairly interesting is the recurring types of people. Hence the title. I find that they always are somewhat interconnected, which is very interesting. 

No matter where you go, there are always the judge mental and cruel people, but then there are the extremely compassionate and loving ones as well.

( that's so not me. I wish though)

Unless you're me. I've only met one person like me in my life. Maybe that's the case for everyone though.

So that's it for now.

But I'm so conflicted about the Internet security resolution for LD debate. I mean, what can I do?

Debate meme

I'm a trendsetter. You just don't know it yet.

Something that's been hidden

Yes it exists. More later.

Trying out that one app Over

It's for OBS. 

Here's to you, Taylor Swift

I secretly loved you five years ago when you weren't cool. 

Okay, maybe love is too strong of a word for knowing some of the lyrics to You Belong with Me and watching your videos. However, keep into consideration that I was young(er). Know that I thought you as a role model.

I knew all the lyrics to Speak Now, to Love Story, to Mine. I was a Swiftie. I sang along to every song on the radio! I knew your height!

Then enter Red. I was do hyped about it. Until I actually listened to it that is. I hated it. We are Never Getting Back Together?

Major ew moment for me! And I knew You were trouble? Way worse?

Where was the country girl Taylor that I knew? And why was this parody person taking her place? And you changed your looks! GASP. 

It was as out of place as this suitcase.

So I didn't listen to you.

Meanwhile, all the girls at school started going to your concerts? Red anyone? Yeah! Taylor Swift is just too good! I know all her songs!

Sure.

I knew about Ed Sheeran before he was mainstream, and now you're telling me he had a duet with Taylor?

I'm not that behind...

Until the Everything has Changed music video came out.

Everything in my life was changing. And here was a song that made me happy. I missed you so much Taylor. Especially the little kiddy songs that made me smile.

Taylor, you shouldn't be angry. I don't think it suits you.

I listened to the rest of your album. I love All Too Well. And don't worry, I didn't search up "why is Taylor Swift too tall" or "how many guys has Taylor Sift dated" or anything. I'm too loyal to do that. Haha.

But I still can't listen to the singles on your album. Give me The Moment I Knew instead.

Here's to you, Taylor Swift.

(Does anyone recognize the book title reference I made? It's Here's to you, Rachel Robinson by Judy Blume)

And I'm getting to understand your boy drama... although not on your level. Maybe in another life...

Feelings

You know what? Today's post isn't going to have pictures. And I know all that clichéd "a picture is worth a thousand words and all", but I really don't care.

Because today is a feelings post. A post about feelings and abstractness and imagination. And hurt and shame and guilt and lalalalalaness, you know.

I haven't posted in what, almost a year? I'm sorry, but my reviews are at Open Book Society (email me at blackandblue@openbooksociety.com).

Now this is a blog about self growth.

I'm entering a new chapter in life (no I'm not saying what as I don't want stalkers sorry), and I'm scared.

Because I feel like a mess-up. I used to be super skinny (not really but skinnier I guess). And then something happened. I can't pinpoint where I messed up or when I messed up. But this is where I am now: probably 20 pounds heavier and ashamed.

I want to stop binging and all. I want to have a normal life with food. I WANT TO GET BACK IN SHAPE. (Sorry for the caps).

So starting today, I'm getting serious.

Blogging provides accountability, and here or there, my feelings are out here. I don't need a Facebook. Correction: I don't have a Facebook or anything more complicated than a blog, so here I am. I'm gonna be healthy.

One blog post at a time.

Hello blogging world. This is Valerie saying her hellos.

By the way, if no one reads this, I'm okay. It's probably best if no one does, to tell you the truth.

You know, I actually might one day be sane. (Probs not though)

So I don't know how to stop binging forever. I don't know. I tried to be pro ana or whatever. It didn't work.

But when I find out and I will, you bet I'm writing a post about it.