Here's to you, Taylor Swift

I secretly loved you five years ago when you weren't cool. 

Okay, maybe love is too strong of a word for knowing some of the lyrics to You Belong with Me and watching your videos. However, keep into consideration that I was young(er). Know that I thought you as a role model.

I knew all the lyrics to Speak Now, to Love Story, to Mine. I was a Swiftie. I sang along to every song on the radio! I knew your height!

Then enter Red. I was do hyped about it. Until I actually listened to it that is. I hated it. We are Never Getting Back Together?

Major ew moment for me! And I knew You were trouble? Way worse?

Where was the country girl Taylor that I knew? And why was this parody person taking her place? And you changed your looks! GASP. 

It was as out of place as this suitcase.

So I didn't listen to you.

Meanwhile, all the girls at school started going to your concerts? Red anyone? Yeah! Taylor Swift is just too good! I know all her songs!

Sure.

I knew about Ed Sheeran before he was mainstream, and now you're telling me he had a duet with Taylor?

I'm not that behind...

Until the Everything has Changed music video came out.

Everything in my life was changing. And here was a song that made me happy. I missed you so much Taylor. Especially the little kiddy songs that made me smile.

Taylor, you shouldn't be angry. I don't think it suits you.

I listened to the rest of your album. I love All Too Well. And don't worry, I didn't search up "why is Taylor Swift too tall" or "how many guys has Taylor Sift dated" or anything. I'm too loyal to do that. Haha.

But I still can't listen to the singles on your album. Give me The Moment I Knew instead.

Here's to you, Taylor Swift.

(Does anyone recognize the book title reference I made? It's Here's to you, Rachel Robinson by Judy Blume)

And I'm getting to understand your boy drama... although not on your level. Maybe in another life...

Feelings

You know what? Today's post isn't going to have pictures. And I know all that clichéd "a picture is worth a thousand words and all", but I really don't care.

Because today is a feelings post. A post about feelings and abstractness and imagination. And hurt and shame and guilt and lalalalalaness, you know.

I haven't posted in what, almost a year? I'm sorry, but my reviews are at Open Book Society (email me at blackandblue@openbooksociety.com).

Now this is a blog about self growth.

I'm entering a new chapter in life (no I'm not saying what as I don't want stalkers sorry), and I'm scared.

Because I feel like a mess-up. I used to be super skinny (not really but skinnier I guess). And then something happened. I can't pinpoint where I messed up or when I messed up. But this is where I am now: probably 20 pounds heavier and ashamed.

I want to stop binging and all. I want to have a normal life with food. I WANT TO GET BACK IN SHAPE. (Sorry for the caps).

So starting today, I'm getting serious.

Blogging provides accountability, and here or there, my feelings are out here. I don't need a Facebook. Correction: I don't have a Facebook or anything more complicated than a blog, so here I am. I'm gonna be healthy.

One blog post at a time.

Hello blogging world. This is Valerie saying her hellos.

By the way, if no one reads this, I'm okay. It's probably best if no one does, to tell you the truth.

You know, I actually might one day be sane. (Probs not though)

So I don't know how to stop binging forever. I don't know. I tried to be pro ana or whatever. It didn't work.

But when I find out and I will, you bet I'm writing a post about it.

October Contest

Hey peeps!
This is the first time I'm going to upload a picture of myself. It's crazy. It's awesome. And it's for Julie Kagawa's contest for some swag. Yup.

In case you can't read that, it says "Got Faery Fruit?" Yeah, we kind of do.
It's from that one time Meghan went insane eating it, courtesy of Puck!
Anyways, I'm the girl in the black. My name is Lilith, and I'm totally a Winter faery.
My friend's name is Dawn, and she's a Summer Court type of girl!
As you can tell, I'm the total dark night faery, and my friend is totally angelic. Legit.

Note: These aren't our real names! Mine is Valerie, and my epic friend's is a mystery.
Join in the fun! Click here!

A Well Deserved Post

I'm going to keep this short and simple, but I'm now posting reviews for Open Book Society! I am so happy posting for OBS! It's so amazing.

If you haven't heard of it, check it out. Here's my one of reviews: Palace of Stone. Sorry that I waited two months to let you guys know!

Valerie!

PS. Email me if you want to at blackandblue@openbooksociety.com!

The Promise by D.D. Chant

One thing you should know about me is that I usually don’t do historical romance. Sure, historical action (which does not exist) is fine, but a whole book centered on romance is a little overboard for me. Yup, I have no patience reading a whole book about a girl and a guy falling in love in Saxon England. It just gets a bit boring! However, with The Promise, I was kind of proved wrong…
4 out of 5 stars

The Promise by D.D. Chant
4 out of 5 stars
Out! Available!

Summary from Goodreads: Dear Reader,

I wish to tell you a tale that began with a promise destined to change the lives of many. When only a child, Lady Adele of Berron lost her family during a dreadful battle and was betrothed to a stranger. Lord Rafe of Valrek, only a boy himself when the battle of Calis raged, grew to be a feared warrior and trusted advisor to his King. But sadness filled his past and Adele served only to remind him of all he had lost. However the promise that bound these two together caused great anger to some. What, Dear Reader, happened in those days of treachery and darkness? Incline your ear that I may whisper the secrets that you so desire to hear......

Lady Quill

Basically, The Promise is the love story between Rafe and Adele. Of course, it’s not just a love story. It’s a historical love story with action and intrigue! Yay! In other words, it’s not boring. And coming from me, that’s pretty high praise. Then again, when you have a story with murders, a nasty villain, action and blood, how can you call it boring? That’s a rhetorical question, isn’t it?

Compared to Broken City, I have to say that The Promise is better. Well, at least that’s my opinion. I feel like the characters are more memorable and the plot was less spontaneous. Also, the typos were less obnoxious. There were still typos, but it was more like missing a comma in the middle of a sentence instead of gaping grammatical errors. (No offense…)

I really liked the writing style! It was clever and addicting without being in your face, as well as having to vintage feel to it. I admired how the style really did sweep me into Saxon England with all the dresses and weapons and others. Plus, it expanded my vocabulary! (Random, I know.) I had to look up some words, but that’s totally fine with me. Now I can officially say I know what yarrow tissane is! Happiness!

The prologue to The Promise is epic! I mean, what other story has a prologue that’s like a letter to the reader, quickly debriefing him or her on the basics of the story? Not only did that save space and words, but it quickly intrigued the reader as well. I’m pretty impressed, which is quite impressive as well. Also, Lady Quill is such a cool name! I wonder if it has to do with writing the story with a quill….

Who knows?

Broken City by D.D. Chant

Valerie is going to do this review in third person. She doesn't exactly have a legitimate reason for doing so, but her excuse is that Broken City is too awesome to do a regular review for. Not that Valerie ever did regular reviews....
 3.5 out of 5 stars

Broken City by D.D. Chant
3.5 out of 5 stars
Out. Happiness!
Summary from Goodreads: Deeta Richards has never seen the outside world. Before she was born a banking crisis brought civilization to an end and now no one leaves the safety of the compounds unless they need to, but Deeta still dreams of seeing more than the building she was born in. Tom is in the guard, this group are the only people that the tribal elders allow to leave the compound and Tom knows only too well that Deeta could never survive the harshness that exists outside. Then tragedy strikes and Deeta and her sister Jan find themselves captured by a hostile tribe. Why does Tom know so much about these people? And why do they know so much about him? As this mystery draws to a climax, they discover that their friend Tom is not quite what he seems...

Valerie really enjoys the character Tom. In her opinion, he is smart, complicated, calm and definitely a hero. He was always there for Deeta, no matter what the circumstances were. Valerie loves how hard it was to figure him out; she loves characters with that characteristic. Not only that, but she also loves Tom's story. He has a whole back story that is surprising and unexpected, but it also explains his character and his reason for being in the same building with Deeta. Valerie greatly favors Tom; according to her he is probably her favorite character in the book.

That's not to detract from Deeta, of course. Valerie liked reading from Deeta's point of view. She liked reading about her life and all of her moments with Tom (obviously!). Valerie enjoys the fact that Deeta is a curious, strong heroine, even considering her sheltered background. Valerie thinks that Deeta is pretty epic! Valerie also thinks that Deeta is realistic character; she's believable and likable as well. Deeta is just plain cool.

The supporting characters, in Valerie's opinion, are well-developed. All of the actions made by them are believable. Valerie was not dumbfounded at any point at how absurd a character ended up being or how odd they were acting. Why? Well, they didn't break character, so they weren't absurd. Valerie loved the variety in ages in the supporting characters. There were children, but there were also older characters as well. Yay!

Valerie loves the plot. She loves how unpredictable it is. She loves how she did not see the ending coming. She's obsessed with the fact that the twists, however unseen, also made sense. Valerie likes how it's unique from most dystopian novels. She likes how there are tribes, which makes it seem a bit more realistic and less unbelievable. As you can see, Valerie really likes this plot. She can tell you might be tired of reading about it, so she will now move on.

The only problem that Valerie has with the story is the amount of typos. It was sometimes hard for Valerie to focus on the story when the missing punctuation marks and spelling errors made it hard to understand the writing. She just wishes that they wouldn't detract from the story. However, at times the typos really annoyed Valerie. At times Valerie got really....

There's a lot of Valerie's in this review... don't you think?

Cracked Up To Be by Courtney Summers

I just wanted to say that Cracked Up to Be is perfectly sad and sadly perfect. (Although I'm not sure why being perfect would be sad. Parker Fadley knows though.) 5 out of 5 stars.

Cracked Up To Be by Courtney Summers
5 out of 5 stars
Out. Buy it. Change your life.
Summary from Goodreads: When "Perfect" Parker Fadley starts drinking at school and failing her classes, all of St. Peter's High goes on alert. How has the cheerleading captain, girlfriend of the most popular guy in school, consummate teacher's pet, and future valedictorian fallen so far from grace? Parker doesn't want to talk about it. She'd just like to be left alone, to disappear, to be ignored. But her parents have placed her on suicide watch and her conselors are demanding the truth. Worse, there's a nice guy falling in love with her and he's making her feel things again when she'd really rather not be feeling anything at all. Nobody would have guessed she'd turn out like this. But nobody knows the truth. Something horrible has happened, and it just might be her fault.

Cracked Up To Be was the exact opposite of what I expected. It's about a girl with issues, and the girl is just trying push everyone away. She's trying to remember this huge mistake she made, even when everyone else has forgotten about it or gotten over it. She's sinking into herself, into this huge hole that replays that one night over and over again. This girl, Parker, just wants to be alone, but no one will let her be.

I didn't hate Parker like some people did. In the beginning, I just couldn't understand why she acted the way she did. I was a little confused by why she was so cold, but as the story kept on going, I started to understand. Parker Fadley is not easy to like, but you can't help loving her. I wanted to scream at her at times, but I couldn't. It was like she was this fragile thing underneath her facade. I felt like she was far away and I couldn't reach her, just like everyone else she knew did.

When I finally figured out why Parker is so broken, I started crying. I normally don't cry when I read books, but I couldn't help it. Parker's mermory is so horrible; I can't imagine having to live through it. Parker gives you the memory in bits and pieces, but that doesn't stop the force of it. I couldn't believe how terrible it was. Well, actually, I could, but it was still really shocking. I mean, from the way Parker acted after, it wasn't hard to believe the truth.

I really hated the ending. I hated how unhappy it was. I guess that's the way it was supposed to be. Parker made this huge mistake. She kept on pushing people away. She has to pay the consequences after. I hated how it ended up that way, with all the happiness a little too far away from her grasp. It made me sad how a sad book ended in a sad ending. But it makes you cry. I haven't written a review in a long time, but Cracked Up to Be made me start writing one. It also made me want to be a little nicer and a little better. It changes you. That's the true beauty of Cracked Up to Be. No matter how much you want to stop thinking about it and just try to stay the same, you can't. You have to change.

I guess that's the way Courtney Summers meant it to be.